We go to 7-11... Buy some bottled drink. $2... Affordable? Yes. Cheap... Well... Relatively...
Then we go to some supermarket and the price of that same drink could be under $1... Well, of course, buying stuff at 7-11 is more convenient at times. And, what's the big deal. It's only a couple of dollars... And that's true.

When I talk to my wife about meals. I ask her what's considered a reasonable price for a weekday lunch. For her $20 is reasonable. Woah!
Ok I'm not judging her decisions and what she wants to buy. But $20... Is what many people would consider... Affordable or reasonable for a meal.

When we go out on weekends, $20 per pax is normal. I think many folks would agree. But yet... Is it considered cheap? Personally, I don't think so.

Coffee at the coffeeshop is around $1.20 these days... Affordable? Yes. But does it add up? Yes as well. Over a year, 365 x $1.20 = $438. Enough to go on a short trip to Thailand.

My wife has taken fancy to a certain restaurant recently and we went there in 2 consecutive weekends. Quite pricy at $20 per pax... These days we hardly eat out so it's not a significant expense to eat out. But to me, I found it expensive. Yet, when I asked her about it, she said it was pretty normal pricing. Acceptable in her view. I understand, we have to pay for the rent, the chef's creativity, ambience, etc... I'm not complaining.

It's rather... Everyone has their own view of what is affordable vs what is cheap. And I think it's good to be aware for ourselves. What is considered reasonable spending and what is unnecessarily more expensive. Like that bottled drink. I personally would not want to buy the bottled drink cos I can find an alternative. But I find the meal at that restaurant to be fairly acceptable, cos the food is unique and I can't really find another place which serves such cuisine, so I'm more willing to dish out that $20 per pax as compared to an overpriced drink.

IKEA... Affordable? Yes. Cheap? Not really. There are a bunch of things that are worthy buys at IKEA. But also a lot of rubbish buys. Unless you're really focused on what you want, it's easy to get distracted and buy something else that's 'slightly' more expensive and looks nicer.

Even when we look at more expensive items, it's similar. For phones, XiaoMi has phones at low $200 or less. But prices of average phones are $400... So many people still buy $400 phones. I have no idea why. Yes, they are only around $200 more. Affordable. But... Do they really use the full capacity of a $400 phone? Many people even doubt the functionality of a cheap XiaoMi phone. Just cos it's cheaper. People think it may not be as good.

And the thing is... This difference between affordable and cheap plagues us throughout our lives and we see it everyday. As we earn more every year, more things become 'affordable'. We brush off small purchases as affordable. Yes, you probably can afford it. But is it worth it? Is it cheap? Is it good value? Does it really bring you more happiness in your life?

That is for you to answer.

For me, I'm just highlighting it so that readers can be more aware and maybe can look at things differently.


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Sex sells. I hope I get more clicks.

Well... This is ERSG... So obviously it's not going to be about sex ed.

I'm talking about life.

Your colleague asks you. How are you?
You reply, fine thank you.
It's just a greeting. You talk to your friends. Everything is fine and dandy...
You post on FB... It's always nice...
Everything's great in life....

Or is it???
Everyone has struggles.
All the time, sometimes, some feel it stronger, some feel it less, some can cope with it better than others...

And somehow, it's been so socially unacceptable to show this... Weakness... Cos struggles as perceived as such... Weaknesses.
And that's a problem...

People have difficulty communicating their issues... And this is made worse that people also don't know how to react when people come to them with issues.

So people just don't express things. Cos listeners don't know how to handle it. And it's hard to find someone willing to listen. And it's also hard to find someone who's going to understand and relate to it. So ends up... Most of the time, people... We... Bottle in a lot of our feelings and troubles with no or little ways to get relief.

And this is what it is... Faking an orgasm... Showing that you're enjoying it when you're not really enjoying it. Putting on a show to make the other person... Or society feel like you're doing ok, when things aren't really ok.

It's not like I don't have struggles and issues. I do... I've learnt to cope with them... From these posts... I doubt readers would know about my fears and insecurities.
Just cos I semi-retired early, doesn't mean life is all smooth sailing. Other issues crop up. Issues like planning for the future, whether finances are enough, boredom, lack of company, etc...

And of course different people tackle their issues differently. I've managed to address and get a control of most of my issues.

But some people aren't able to, and there's no shame in that, and there's no shame in asking for help. But also, most of the time, it's not easy to get help, cos they don't know who to turn to, cos... The problem is... Most of the time, we have avoided talking about issues so much that we, as listeners aren't as able to listen and handle such interactions when help is needed.

If I told everyone I was having troubles or insecure. Most people would say. ERSG relax... Everything is ok. Look at the cleaner or the tissue seller. Those are the folks who should be insecure. Not you... Simply put... Usually we try to make the other person feel better by trying to give a relative perspective that someone else is worse and that the person isn't doing so bad and shouldn't feel like they should have any issues...
BUT, this is in essence brushing away and trivializing their concerns and worries. So they stop talking... They stop talking to you... And the approach someone else... And what happens? Usually? The same thing... And after a while... These people shut off. They don't talk to anyone else. Cos no one is going to understand or relate to them. Everyone just says that they are doing fine... But it's not. The cleaner has his own issues. But his issues aren't my issues and aren't your friends' issues... All our issues and troubles are different but we feel them with our own minds and emotions.
The cleaner may have financial insecurities but he may mentally be able to handle them better than me. And maybe I need help. So stop comparing me to him...

You remember when you were in primary or secondary school? Most of us have best friends. We talked about anything, talked on the phone for hours, gossiped about people, talked about what we like, what we don't like... It's really innocent. But it allows us to express our feelings and when we are young, we don't get caught up in the societal norm that expressing fear and troubles are weaknesses... We don't judge as much or fear being judged as much... But as we grow older, we talk less on the phone. We express things less. We curate the posts on FB to make everyone think that life is great. We have less time for each other, we have less time talking about our lives and expressing ourselves become more difficult.

And this sucks. But yet it is what it is. Most if not all of us fake an orgasm to the world. We are having a great time. We don't want others to think we are losers. And of course social media isn't helping, cos we always see people having a great time on their FB and we think they are having a great time. But yet probably they are faking their orgasm as well. But we don't see that so people may end up thinking, how come so and so can travel so much, can buy a big car and I'm still such an under achiever.

So think about it. What do you really feel. Are you as happy as your FB posts suggests? Are you as happy in reality as what you show your friends? Family? Colleagues? Remember yesterday's post? Everyone sees you differently.

Are you happy? Do you need help? How about your friends? Maybe they need help. Have you been a good listening ear? Maybe it's time to start being one.



*PS. I currently don't have any fears and insecurities so if any of my friends are reading this. I'm doing ok.
Hmmm... Or maybe I'm just in denial... Who knows...


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I just saw this post on FB... I thought it was interesting.
It's just this picture today. Short post.
It's really something to ponder about.
​

Is there a real/true you?
​
All of them are you. If all of them are real, means there are multiple realities.

Your reality and each and everyone elses reality.
If what you believe is good, someone else thinks is bad, it's just as real to him as it is to you.

It's all just different perspectives.


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Well it's been almost 1 year from the date I started my freegan journey. On 1 Dec 2017, I started exploring about freegan living.

I've mentioned before. Freegan living is more of a mentality than just being cheapo. I still spend money. But now, I ask myself, "how can I get this for free?" Before I spend money. Or I keep a look out for stuff when certain things are wearing out and try to obtain them before my existing item spoils.

The thing is... This year has been amazing. My quality of life has pretty much improved.

I get my daily meals mainly for free, cos I get fruits and veges from Pasir Panjang. This had allowed me to naturally shift to a low meat diet. I still eat meat if I dine out or if I eat with friends or family, or if I get free meat from my freegan activities. But I could possibly say that 80% of my meals are vegetarian/vegan.

This has allowed me to lose weight and fit into my older berms and clothes and this has been quite nice.

A number of freegans has asked me how I do it. Cos we always get so much food and it's hard to stop eating cos there's always a continuous supply.

For me, it takes a lot of discipline to just keep my normal meals. And since I don't spend money, I intentionally don't buy meat and other snacks. So a mainly vegetable diet helps a lot in weight loss.

This is my biggest change cos it impacts me on a daily basis...

My quality of live has also improved in other areas... I've mentioned in my previous post that I now have 2 coffee machines. One that grinds beans and drips the coffee, and a Dolce Gusto capsule machine. It's pretty awesome cos previously I only drank instant coffee. However, I don't get beans or capsules all the time. So I don't get to drink it everyday. I still have to wait for free beans and capsules before I can drink it.

I used to wear $2 flip flops... Now I wear Havana's... Someone gave me a pair of 2nd hand Havana's. So I soaked it in Dettol and water and now I have a "better" pair of slippers. Just in time cos my older pair was wearing out.

I used to wear army black sandals. I still wear army black sandals cos it hasn't spoiled yet. But I have a pair of relatively new Teva sandals in the drawer waiting to be used. When I received it from a friend in the community, it looked like it wasn't used and just dusty, but I still soaked them in Dettol to disinfect it.

For those who don't know... Teva's aren't cheap...

I'm now using a $500 iron to iron my clothes... It's still like my old iron. But I deem it an upgrade from my old $25 iron.

Once I made it known to friends and family that I was willing to accept 2nd hand items or expired food, or I tell them to give me stuff so that I could further give it to someone else, they were quite happy to pass things on to me. Which is great cos I help them to clear up their house. Many times, they want to dispose, but they feel it is 'sayang' to throw something away, cos it still can be used, so they just keep it in the storeroom. Now that they know I may use it or pass it on to someone else, I help them clear their stuff, I get some free stuff, I pass on what I don't need to someone else, there's overall less wastage of resources.

I had some disagreement with a reader about how my house would be like after getting so much free stuff... He said I would end up hoarding and it would mess up my life. This has obviously not happened. My home is pretty much the same as a year ago.

Although I now have a lot more food stocks such as canned food, potato chips, instant noodles, etc... Problem is I don't eat much processed food cos I always get fresh vegetables, so it's quite tough to consume all the stocks. I consume them mainly when I come back from the biz trips with my wife and I haven't collected any fresh food yet.

I think probably the most awesome thing is that I've managed to get to know a community of like minded people. We each live our own different lives, but are united by the similar interests of the love for free stuff and the ideal of not wanting to waste things unnecessarily.

Also, the community helps each other by sharing knowledge, skills, looking out for each other, when we see something that we think someone else will like, we'll help to take for them, etc...

This past year has been an awesome experience. I don't see myself stopping this anytime soon. Of course I've crafted my freegan lifestyle into what I want out of it. Everyone has their own wants and it's up to themselves to make the effort to make things work.

If someone wants all the free items without getting involved in the community, then that's probably not realistic. It's really the idea of... The more you put in, the more you get out of it.

​And in the process, I feel I've become a better person and learnt a lot of new things and been exposed to new ideas... And I look forward to continuing these activities in the coming year and longer.


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As I hang around the group of freegans, I've gradually become slightly more environmentally conscious. So I don't take plastic bags from supermarkets anymore. I still use my AIA vitality vouchers at cold storage but I just take out the reusable bags which I keep in my backpack all the time.

I've also started bringing out dabao containers so that I can pack any leftover food which I am not able to finish if I ever go out to eat with my friends or wife.

And I even carry a small water bottle with me, so that I always have water with me and I don't need to buy any from 7-11 or any other place. Saves money and reduces the proliferation of single use plastics.

So anyway, back to plastic bags...
The thing is... Just around a year back, I was still taking plastic bags from NTUC. Where else would I throw away all my daily rubbish... But as I went around being freegan, and consciously being more environmentally conscious, I realize, there's a lot of stuff to throw rubbish in...

For instance, I think many of us have paper bags... Nice looking paper bags from Bee Cheng Hiang, Eu Yan Sang, DFS, etc etc... Most of us have a load of these nicer bags that we just keep in the storeroom, they look nice so people don't use them as rubbish bags, but... End up... People don't even use them at all. They are usually just hoarded and stored in the storeroom forever. And when it's time for spring cleaning, people just dump loads of these nice bags away...

The first thing I did when I stopped taking plastic bags was to use these other plastic bags or paper bags, like those big ones from Takashimaya. Don't bluff, I'm sure most of us have a load of these bags at home, but we think it's too nice to be used as rubbish bags...

Well... Instead of taking new plastic bags from supermarkets, I'd suggest just using whatever you already have at home. Else it's just going to be wasted anyway.

Recently, I walked past the rubbish area of my block... And on the ground, there was 2 big paper bags of paper/plastic bags... LV bags, Miu Miu, etc... Nice pretty paper bags for delivering a gift, but after that, they were hoarded and eventually discarded by someone. I picked up these 2 big bags and brought them home... So now I have more paper bags for throwing away rubbish in.

So really, we don't really need to take more plastic bags from supermarkets.
We think we need plastic bags cos we're so used to wrapping our rubbish in plastic bags from supermarkets. The thing is... Any bag will do, any box will do. Instead of throwing away the tissue box into the plastic bag... Why not just use the tissue box itself as a rubbish container?

There are so many other options...

Thing is... I'm not really environmentally conscious... I don't think so much about the environment. But that doesn't mean I just take more than I can consume. If I don't need more food, I don't take it. Even though I can get a lot of food for free. If I don't need more items I don't take it also. Even though I can get stuff for free. And in this case, I don't need more plastic bags or paper bags. So I don't take them too.

It's really not so troublesome to carry around a reusable cloth bag in my backpack all the time. I carry 3 reusable bags at all times. Cos I can give to my friends if they want one. Furthermore, I still have plenty from the stash at home.

I find it's really a habit issue. I was always resistant to the idea of carrying around reusable bags initially. I thought it would be troublesome. But once I actually put the reusable bags into my backpack, then I very naturally took them out when I needed to use them. The main issue, I realized, is that I never did the first step. Which is just to go take the cloth bag from the storeroom and put it in my backpack. Once I did that first step, it became very normal to keep using it.


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So in the previous post, I made a short comment about the ridiculousness that we need consumption to keep the economy flowing. If consumption falls, there's a chance the economy falls into recession and people lose their jobs and everyone suffers...

Ever wonder why that's the case?

Think about it.
It's a simple answer...

Debt.
And the whole world is drowning in debt.

Businesses borrow money to buy equipment and produce things. If their products aren't bought, the company closes down, people loses their jobs, banks who lend money loses their money.

When people lose their jobs, they can't pay their debt as well, their home mortgages, car loan, etc. Banks lose money again.

The truth is, there's really only a few items we need for our daily lives, and we don't really need to consume so much. We don't need to waste so much. We don't need to own 120 t-shirts and 20 pairs of jeans. But yet... Many people do.

And many people just keep buying and throwing away and buying and the cycle continues. Cos we are exposed to so much marketing that we NEED all these things. And marketers know that humans love the dopermine when people buy stuff so they make things easy to buy and so readily available.

But yet if we think about it deeper, how did all these problems arise?
Due to debt.

If I work and earn and buy a plot of land and rear a bunch of chickens and plant some vegetables. I can relatively be self sustaining. How much can I eat everyday? If the rest of the world stops consuming, what does it matter to me?

It's an oversimplification, but the idea is... Why can't the economy be in a state of self sustenance? Why must it keep growing and people keep consuming to keep the economy going?

But also, I'd admit, that debt allows things to develop faster. Like if a government borrows money to build roads and infrastructure. Or it also helps businesses develop as well and can help provide a good service to society, like maybe a telco company who may borrow money to build towers for reception.

From my point of view... There is a limit to consumption. Most people don't need alot of things. But when they are exposed to marketing and temptation, they very naturally just consume more. Everyone has loads of items in their homes, but how many items are used on a monthly basis? Weekly basis? Daily basis?

But yet when people slow down on consumption, economies face a recession and people lose their jobs and homes and everyone suffers.

Is this a stupid system? For me, I think it's ridiculous. It's like a Ponzi scheme. It must keep going. Else everything will fall apart.

But yet, if people banded together and create small self sustaining communities, wouldn't that be better for the Earth and everyone else?
Economies wouldn't be so reliant on mindless consumption and buying new stuff, people would not be in debt, they would have more time to develop relationships and enjoy life more.

Unfortunately, it doesn't seem like the system is going to change anytime soon. And somehow many people are stuck in this cycle of consumption and debt.


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So picking up from yesterday's post about induced spending and festive spending... Christmas is by far one of the worst festivals for the Earth.

People buying useless gifts and ornaments for each other, only to be kept aside for years and eventually discarded. An utter waste of resources. Billions in value every year are produced, purchased and districted. Just for an impression of giving...

I've put out word to my relatives... I hope they listen... If they want to buy me anything, just buy me a bar of chocolate. Simple and I'll like it. Please don't buy me clothes or any other thing. I have whatever I need already and a bar of chocolate is a simple gift that I will eventually consume so it will never be wasted.

It's really unfortunate how consumerism has taken hold of our society, just to keep the economy flowing. There's really something wrong with the whole idea of that. The idea that if purchases and consumption stops, the economy will go into a tailspin and people will lose their jobs and everyone would suffer.

Anyway, back to Christmas. A day of celebration and sharing ended up as a day of mindless consumption and pointless gifts to each other...

How many of us enjoy wasting money buying useless gifts for our friends and colleagues and receiving similar things in return. I think most of us don't like receiving Crabtree & Evelyn hand creams and think of ways to re-gift those hand cream away to someone else.

It's just silly... Yet somehow, due to social norms we continue to do it. Even though most of us don't like it. And yet the thing about social norms is that we are the ones who dictate what is considered a social norm.

Except for one quirky friend... Whom I find really cool. He buys funky stuff during gift exchanges. Like $30 worth of dishwashing liquid or a standing fan, etc... Basically, he buys unconventional but useful stuff, and I find it pretty cool, cos at least when I get anything from him, it will somehow be useful.


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Few days back it was the usual 11.11 shopping day. Also known as singles day.

Don't know why people decided that they needed a special day for induced spending. But humans are generally illogical so what can I say right?

Anyway, in many of my normal group chats, people were discussing what they were buying. Other friends were asking for help to "slash" the prices off their Lazada purchases. Apparently if you get your friends to click a link, you can get a discount for certain items.

As I was going about my daily life that day, I kept rolling my eyes... Are there so many things that need to be purchased? If there was no Singles Day, would they have made those purchases?

My wife also decided to make some purchases from taobao. She decided that she would order some gifts in preparation of Christmas for her colleagues. I supposed it's somewhat necessary to give a token gift when working, I also used to give a token gift to my teammates when I used to be working. My wife's purchases wasn't too expensive so it wasn't too big a deal.
​
The thing I understood from 11.11 was that, people want to spend. They like to spend. They want excuses to spend. And by creating a reason to spend, like 11.11, retailers are able to induce people to buy more things that they usually wouldn't...

Which leads me to my next post... Christmas...


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Ok I posted on this some days earlier.

My laptop had been giving me problems. I tried to fix it... Somewhere along the fixing process, it seemed to get worse, even after I reinstalled Windows.
I discovered that my harddisk had some issues and it's suspected that I have a harddisk problem, not just a software issue.

So it's going to take awhile before I get it fixed. I'm thinking I'll search around Sim Lim to see if they can help me change the harddisk and reinstall Windows for cheap. Maybe if I can get it fixed for $100 it would be worth it.

This laptop cost me $800, 3 years ago, so... Maybe it's time for a new one? But if I can push out another 2 years or so using $100 to fix it, maybe it's worth it...

Anyway, posts will be slow cos it's really no fun typing on the phone.
I still have my last months expense update to post and there's no easy way to do spreadsheets and post using a phone so...

Stay tuned, hoping I'll be able to get the laptop fixed in the next few weeks, cos I'll be going overseas soon again so there'll be some delays to the fixing.


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I was watching this clip on Facebook.
It's in Mandarin and my Mandarin sucks but I got the main gist of the story.

If you can watch and understand it, I highly recommend it.

Else I'll try to summarize below...
​

Ok the speaker makes references to the story of the Butterfly Lovers which is a Chinese classic.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Butterfly_Lovers

I'll do a super brief summary.

Zhu Yingtai falls in love with Liang Shanbo.
Liang Shanbo also loves her back.
Zhu Yingtai is betrothed to a wealthy merchant, Ma Wencai.
Liang Shanbo is heartbroken and his health gradually deteriorates and he dies.
On the day of Zhu's marriage to Ma, Zhu leaves the procession to pay her respects at Liang's grave. She begs for the grave to open up. Suddenly, the grave opens up and Zhu throws herself into the grave to join Liang. Their spirits emerge in the form of a pair of butterflies and fly away together, never to be separated again.

Ok so the speaker in the video makes comparisons of working in a company you don't like to the love story.

If Zhu Yingtai never knew Liang Shanbo, she would never know what love is. She would have happily accepted the wealthy merchant and learned to live with him and maybe eventually love him or just live with it. And in olden china, she would never have met another guy and would never know what love is EVER.

If we look at our jobs... If we never find a job that we love, we would never understand people who love their jobs.

It is only cos Zhu Yingtai managed to find a man she loved, that's why she could not fathom marrying another guy.

If like my wife, who loves her job, she cannot understand why people want to retire early.

How many people would marry PURELY for money? Some would, many won't. But yet for work, many people would work purely for money. They go to work miserable but they console themselves that they are here just for the money.

Is that fair to yourself? Is that fair to the company? It is easy to lie to the company, but it's not so easy to lie to yourself...

Ok that's a super short summary...
It's a lot better if you're able to watch the clip yourself.

Of course the comparison isn't perfect. We meet more people than we experience different jobs. Etc etc, many other conditions.

For me, what I take away from watching the clip is very simple... We don't know what we don't know. If we haven't experienced something before, doesn't mean it doesn't exist. It also doesn't mean it exists also. It means... It's unknown.
​
I believe that there's such thing as loving your job, cos I see it in my wife everyday. But if I never knew her, maybe I would never believe that there's such a thing as love your job, cos I have never experienced it.

Similar to Zhu Yingtai, who may never have learned that love exists if she never met Liang Shanbo.


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