Blog Archives

Spending is a Habit

29/11/2019

Yep, spending is a habit. That's why shops like to give promotions to get you to go to their place.
It's like Starbucks giving out 1 for 1 promotions.
Or bubble tea, etc...

Recently, I started experimenting on this app Too Good to Go, Part 1 and Part 2.
It's a cheap meal €3.99 for a meal which is around 1.5 servings so if I make a soup for the night, it's just nice for the 2 of us.
I've bought it 3 times... the first 2 times I wrote about, I bought yesterday, and I'm contemplating buying it again today.
And the thing is, the "cheap" and convenient food has become addictive. Not cos it's really nice, but cos it's really convenient. The food is fair, not great, but nice enough that the price makes some sense.
But the convenience of it is extraordinary. I don't need to get any free food in the morning. I don't need messy cleanups after preparation or after dinner, etc.
I've gotten pretty much addicted to the habit of convenience.

And that's what spending is. People get addicted to the <insert feelings here>.
Could be addicted to the daily routine of getting a Starbucks before work.
Could be addicted to the convenience of taking Grab.
Could be addicted to the high when splashing out $3000 for a bag.
When I was back in SG, every weekend I had wonton mee for breakfast. And it's comfort food. That's addictive as well. Comfort.

Spending is a habit.
Do you have a routine?
Maybe it's buying a kopi on the way to work. Or maybe it's buying Breadtalk bread on your way back from work for breakfast tomorrow.
Or maybe it's that Starbucks coffee after lunch?
Or maybe it's dessert after lunch.
Could be that bubble tea you buy after going marketing at NTUC.

Once you get used to it, it's nothing.
Same as for me over here. €3.99 is considered cheap. It's around S$6 for a cooked meal with dessert and a starter. It's just like any western meal in SG, and in SG I don't even get a dessert.
And of course I tell myself... "I can stop it anytime" just like any smoker.
But maybe I don't ... I'm pretty sure the smoker usually won't.
I tell myself that we can afford it... and it's true. Same like the kopi everyday, or Starbucks everyday...

There's absolutely nothing wrong with spending being a habit. As long as the individual can afford it.
For me, it's ok to spend. BUT, personally, this goes against what I believe in.
Food is free, I should stick to that and not be lazy. I should go and find food and cook.
Spending on food is ok. But for me, I feel it shouldn't be a habit. A personal choice.
To me, this is about me trying to be better. Similar to keeping good diet habits. Eating fried chicken is ok, but as long as it doesn't become a bad habit until the overall diet plan is ruined.
And in my view, food is free, I shouldn't be spending on it since it's not hard getting it free. It's just... easier paying for it.

Anyway... have you created any habits which you're unaware of?
Should you kick that bubble tea habit? High in sugar, expensive per drink?

Hey, nothing wrong with spending. As long as it's a conscious choice and not just a mindless habit.
Or at least know that it has become a habit, then decide to keep it or remove it.

As for me... maybe one last paid meal tonight... ;)

PS, I'll be going to Houston on Sunday for recce trip so my posts may drop in the next few days.

<<PREVIOUS POST // NEXT POST>>

Did you like this post? If so, could you "blanjah" me 1/4 cup of my morning coffee pls.
You may also consider subscribing to receive the articles in your email, link in the column on the right.

0 Comments

The Benefits of being Unemployed

28/11/2019

2 Comments

Ok, so... I use the term unemployed.
It's easier than saying retirement, semi retirement, whatever, I don't need to explain too much when I say unemployed. But sometimes, people offer me ideas for jobs and such which is a bit annoying...

But anyway, today's post isn't about definitions.
Today, I'll be talking about cause and effect. 因果

I think... I've come a long way. From the me who first started this blog.
If you go back to my posts in 2013 vs now, it's a big difference.
I was working, jaded thinking to retire early. My expenses were relatively low, but now I consider those expenses super high, compared to what I spend now.

I left my job and pondered about the nothingness of life.
I "retired" early.
I learnt about freeganism.
My food expense dropped to super low levels.
I'm in Paris now.
I'm going to Houston soon.

This journey has been pretty interesting since I left my job in Nov 2014. It's been 5 years since I left my job.

I stayed at my parents place til Aug 2015, then moved to my HDB. So by next year some of my neighbours will be moving house. Since I wasn't working, I could slowly buy stuff and furnish up my home. Didn't need to pay some interior designer to handle it for me.

Then I had around another 2 years more of hanging around. Nothing much, went to the supermarket weekly to look for cheap deals to buy meat and other groceries.

Things took more of an interesting turn in 2017.
If I didn't leave my job, I would not have learnt about freeganism in Nov 2017.
(OMG, when I went to check out old post on my encounter with freeganism, the previous post is about living overseas!!! What a coincidence, considering my life currently.)
I would never have made a whole bunch of new friends.
I would never have realized how so much things could be obtained for free. There's so much excess in the world. So much wastage, and it's all free for the taking.
I spent the bulk of 2018 doing freegan stuff, doing food rescue, hanging out with friends. That was a fun year.

Early 2019, we got notice that we needed to move to Paris. So I really stepped up my playing. I was going out very often in the early months of 2019, cos I knew I was going to miss a lot of the activities in SG.
Then mid 2019, we left for Paris.
As much as I grumble about my life in Paris, it still is a good experience.
I learnt that life is the same wherever you go. Most people just go to work, go home, and hang out with friends on weekends. Same as in SG and probably many parts of the world.
Free stuff is also available in Paris.
I learnt that I do poorly in cold weather. Friends are important for mental health.
Eating out is expensive in many developed countries.
Things move slower in Paris, but it's ok, cos everyone moves at this speed. It's like Malaysia.
The French aren't as rude or racist as what many people believe them to be. Actually, there are a lot of mixed race couples here. I see more mixed couples than in SG.

I also got to ponder a lot about life and what we(people) really need to retire.
The experience of living a retired life vs thinking about a retired life when one is working, is very different.
The idea of beach holidays and golf sessions just isn't real.
There will be a lot of idle time for yourself, you'll need to find someway to spend free time, hang with friends, etc.
The amount of money required is vastly over estimated.
I learnt some things which I thought was important when I was younger is actually not important, and some things that I thought weren't important are more important.

And all these experiences won't be possible if I was working.
I probably wouldn't have learnt about freeganism.
I likely wouldn't have wanted to follow my wife overseas cos I would be working and the loss of my income would be more than any additional allowances she would get.
I wouldn't have had the opportunity to live in a different country.
I might be living a very normal life. Work, home, weekend splurge on food and other luxuries. Can you imagine... I spent S$400 for 2 pax for Sunday brunch at Raffles Hotel last time when I was younger.

And soon, I'll be going to Houston.
I'll probably have to live through one hurricane, one or two floods, cos Houston gets hit by hurricanes and floods every year. That's going to be a new experience.
Then I'll likely have some activities involving guns... Maybe go to a range and shoot.
I'll probably see people carrying guns around, cos in Texas, open carry of guns are allowed.
And Texas BBQ...
A whole load of other experiences.

The thing is... not working allows for other opportunities to arise. And the lack of a daily job allows one to pick up these opportunities and run with them. And, it's going to be a different life experience.
And depending on the attitude of the individual, one can take it in a good way or a bad way.
One could lose their sense of identity after quitting their job, lose friends, have nothing to do, etc...
Or one could go out and make a whole new life for themselves, try new things, pursue other activies.
It's really up to you.

And... well... I wouldn't have had many of my current experiences if I was still working.
And this made me think of this quote...

So next time when you're retired, or when you quit your job, remember, that there's a whole new life out there waiting for you. It's up to you to find it for yourself.
It's going to be fun and exciting. You just need to have the right attitude and make things work for yourself.

<<PREVIOUS POST // NEXT POST>>

Did you like this post? If so, could you "blanjah" me 1/4 cup of my morning coffee pls.
You may also consider subscribing to receive the articles in your email, link in the column on the right.

2 Comments

CPF Special Account as an Investment Product

27/11/2019

2 Comments

Most Singaporeans look towards CPF as forced savings.
In the Ordinary account, the interest is 2.5% or 3.5% depending on how much is in there.
In Special account, the interest is 4% or 5%.

But I don't think many Singaporeans look to it as an investment product that they can "buy" into.

First things first. If we're going to be talking about CPF, there's a few points we need to first consider.
1) Do you trust the Government of Singapore in the long term?
2) Do you think you will live in Singapore for the rest of your life?

So, if you think that CPF is a ponzi scheme, then there's nothing to talk about.
The best way to handle CPF for someone like this is to use up as much of their CPF funds by using it to buy anything they can use it for. Housing, Investments, etc.

But, if you trust the CPF and that eventually, you believe that you'll get your monies back, then the next question becomes, will you be living in Singapore in your old age.
This question isn't too important, cos IF you ever choose to migrate and take up another citizenship, then you can just withdraw all your CPF money.

So the thought process is...
IF you want to stay in Singapore when you're old, then there's no escaping the CPF Retirement Sums. Which is to set aside CPF funds so that you can enjoy CPF Life. You'll need to set aside money when you're 55 years old.
IF you don't want to stay in Singapore, then no difference, cos you can migrate and withdraw your money.

I'll put out some assumptions on how I build this train of thought.
Most Singaporeans work til 55 and above.
Most Singaporeans don't invest much, put in Fixed D, or are persuaded by bankers to buy some "safe" structured products.
Most Singaporeans will stay in Singapore for most of their lives and won't migrate.
Many Singaporeans buy too much stuff anyway and actually have excess money to save IF they wanted to, so they don't really need excess liquidity.

If we look at things this way, putting money into the CPF Special account makes a whole lot of sense.
4% isn't too shabby. It's actually a pretty good rate of return.
Someone could potentially use the CPF SA as a long term fixed deposit account.
And when the person is 55 years old, this person can take out any excess money above the Retirement Sum required.

If you don't need the flexibility of the Ordinary account, you could even transfer a bulk of the funds from the OA to the SA and enjoy a higher interest rate.

Of course, the main problem here is that we can't touch the funds from the Special account.
But if you're a frugal Singaporean with intent to work til 55 years or more, then you probably won't need too much money in the Ordinary account OR the bank account, after taking into account an emergency fund.

So for example...
You could be a very prudent Singaporean... I have a friend like this...
She wants to pay off her bank loan as soon as possible for her housing. She works in a fairly ok job. Not super high pay, but good enough. This is the same as her husband.
She is highly risk adverse, and has multiple insurance policies and she doesn't like investments.
For someone like her, she could pay the minimum monthly installment amount for her HDB loan at a fixed 2.6%, then any excess free cash, she could just use to top up her CPF SA account.
Currently, she uses her excess cash to pay off her 2.6% CPF loan. But it is actually better for her to top up her SA account.
Of course she would need to have some sort of emergency fund for any unforeseen circumstances.
Then when she reaches 55 years old, she will be able to withdraw a sizable amount from her CPF, cos in all likelihood, she would have fulfilled the CPF Retirement Sum and more.

Or even for me, I might look towards topping up my SA account.
This is similar to my older post, Defending your Position.
CPF retirement Sum, is required... If you're intending to stay in Singapore for the long term, there's no two ways about it. So it's prudent for me to top it up until the required retirement sum.
Cos maybe if I invest it, markets may be poor when I'm 55 years old and I won't have enough cash to top up my Retirement Sum, cos currently the amount in my SA and OA aren't enough for the Retirement Sum.

So for me/us, we've pretty much paid off our HDB.
Then we have set aside a chunk of money for investment.
But on the side, we also are paying off our other "debts".
Cos investments will fluctuate. The value of my investments will go up and down.
But debts don't fluctuate. We have to settle them sooner or later.
And personally, I'd rather settle my debts when my investments are up. Although this may mean I'll have less funds for even MORE investments.
BUT, at least I'm sure that when my investments are down... which I'm sure eventually they will be, cos that's the normal cycle of investments...
When when my investments are down, I'll like to have really low "debts" or maybe even no "debts".

I consider CPF Retirement Sum something like a "debt" cos... well we have to have that amount, otherwise, we will need to pledge our homes to "top up" the shortfall, and IF we sell our place, the money will be returned to CPF for the Retirement Sum.

And well... any excess can still be withdrawn at 55 years old! That's a good thing. It's a safe 4% return.
IF you trust the Government and CPF.

So maybe you could look towards the CPF Special account as an investment product instead of thinking of it as locking up your money. Cos really... 4% is a pretty good rate of return.
It could be a good addition or alternative to whatever other investments which you are already doing.

<<PREVIOUS POST // NEXT POST>>

Did you like this post? If so, could you "blanjah" me 1/4 cup of my morning coffee pls.
You may also consider subscribing to receive the articles in your email, link in the column on the right.

2 Comments

We have time for ANYTHING, We don't have time for EVERYTHING

26/11/2019

0 Comments

How often do we hear... I don't have time to exercise, I don't have time to learn a new language, I don't have time... insert whatever you want...

The thing is... it's not that we don't have time. We all have time to do whatever we want.
We just don't have the right priority for it.

If you have time to watch TV, means you have time to exercise.
If you have time to work til 8pm, means you have chosen to prioritize work and money over time with your kids.
If you have time to take a 2 hour lunch, you could use 30 minutes a day to learn a new language.

I learnt French 10 minutes a day for over a year. That's 3650 minutes or 60 hours of lessons.
You may think that 10 minutes a day isn't worth a lot, but think about it. I looked at French words everyday for 10 minutes, EVERYDAY. Compare this with someone who learnt 1 hour a day for 60 days and then stops lessons. At the end of 1 year, who do you think will remember most of the words?

The thing is, we have time for anything we want, SURE, we don't have time to do everything. We all live in a world of priorities. And the thing is, we decide our priorities.

So what we perceive to be a lack of time, is usually a lack of priority of whatever activity we want to do.
We blame "time" or the lack of it, cos it's easier to blame time.
It's harder to blame ourselves. It's harder to say... I'm lazy, I'd rather watch TV than exercise.

It's easier to blame work and the boss for bad working timelines, than changing a job.
Both my wife and I typically left work on time. I know many people who work til late, I know many people who leave work on time. This leads me to conclude that there are sufficient jobs available for people to choose from such that they can obtain a job where they can achieve regular working hours.

The thing is... most of the time, the money is good, or maybe you love the job, so you don't want to change a new job... BUT, that's not the job's fault. I recognize that some jobs require some crazy hours and employees are ok with that.
But the thing is... that just means you're prioritizing money or the love of the job over something else, like maybe time with kids, or learning a new language, or exercise.

There's always a choice.
It may not be a good choice, but there's always a choice.

Some people complain that they have to support their kids and their parents resulting in the sandwich generation...
They say that they have no choice.
But is this true?
It's a choice isn't it? Sure, it's a bad choice and another bad choice.
The person needs to support the kids and parents, or the other choice is to well... don't support the parents as much. Give them less money, ask them to go McDonald's to work, or ask the kids to go McDonald's to work.
Still a choice, not a good choice, but a choice nonetheless.

It depends on the person's priorities.
Maybe the person prioritizes pride, or filial piety over themselves, they rather sacrifice themselves, work harder, work longer hours, than to ask their parents to go back to work, or they don't want to sell their car, or downgrade to a smaller place, or ask their parents to move in with them.

The thing is...
We all have choices, options, we have time, we have control over large portions of our lives.
The options aren't always great. Some options suck.

BUT, I think we need to remember, these are all choices. And we must remember what we are sacrificing and what we are getting in return, cos these are the priorities.

For example, someone who prioritizes career over family... well... that was a choice. And when the person is older, well... the person will have to live with the decision and any regret if any.

Same as someone who prioritizes TV over exercise... same thing... if that person ends up unhealthy, then well, they must remember they had 30 years of good TV watching and the sacrifice is maybe health.
It's not like the person didn't get anything in return. They did. They got many years of TV watching. I'm not saying that the value of TV watching is low. For all I know, the person values TV watching a lot and he should have the choice to choose TV watching over health IF he feels it's worth it.

Same as for me. I gave up my career. I wanted more free time to enjoy my life. I know I won't be super rich, I'll lag behind many of my friends. And that's my sacrifice. My priority. And we all have our own different priorities. For me, I prioritize living a chill life at 30+ years old, and I give up having a career and potentially earning a lot more money.

So next time we/you/I think about not enough of time, money, etc... think about what are we prioritizing.
Most of us have enough time and money to do a lot of things. We can't do everything. But we can do most of the things we want.

If you feel trapped by your circumstance, there's always options. The options may not be perfect and they may suck, but there's always options. If you don't want to change, then most likely you're prioritizing something else over something else.
Maybe it's pride, impression, fulfilling someone's expectations, societal expectations, money, career, laziness, etc.

I know someone like that, she feels trapped in her situation, parents expectations, wants to give her kids a certain lifestyle, unwilling to downgrade, always says she has no money, and she has depression, she's on some medication to handle her depression.
I've talked to her about her situation. Asked what she's willing to give up. She's not willing to give up anything to improve her mental state.
Her excuse/reason is... "I'm not like that, I'm not that kind of person to... I can't...".
So essentially, she has prioritized everything else above her own mental health. Maybe she's afraid of change, that means she has prioritized comfort of the situation and the status quo, etc...
It's a choice. So she can keep some of her priorities and she has to sacrifice things along the way.

Alternatively, she could sacrifice her lifestyle, break some parents expectations, downgrade her lifestyle and maybe she can get some mental health back... And once again, it's a choice.

Now, I'm not here to judge choices. Anyone can choose their own path. I'm just here to highlight that there are choices, the options aren't always good, but there ARE options.
And of course the options will require change and other sacrifices. So that's why it depends on your priorities.

Some choices take time and effort and planning. That's good too. For example, early retirement. It's a choice to work, save hard, spend less, maybe have less of a social life, pay of the mortgage early, etc...

Or as much as I grumble about being in Paris and maybe in Houston in future, it's also a choice for me. I chose to prioritize my wife's career. I could have not followed her to Paris. Or I could even fly back to SG without telling her any day. Sure, it's not a nice thing to do, and I'm sure that there will be consequences, but for the time being, I'm choosing to be here.
It's my "sacrifice" that together, we will be happier doing this for now and maybe it will be good for our future. Maybe it gives us other options in future, and so I'm prioritizing that over my own happiness for the time being.

So remember, whenever you think you don't have time, don't have money, or are feeling trapped in whatever situation you are in, ask yourself, what are you prioritizing? You can always walk away from a job, parents expectations, downgrade your lifestyle, etc... If you don't want to do it, means you're prioritizing something else over something else.

What are YOUR priorities?

<<PREVIOUS POST // NEXT POST>>

Did you like this post? If so, could you "blanjah" me 1/4 cup of my morning coffee pls.
You may also consider subscribing to receive the articles in your email, link in the column on the right.

0 Comments

Is Mental Illness Preventable?

25/11/2019

1 Comment

There's more recognition about mental illnesses, in particular, depression, these days. And I acknowledge it's a serious issue.

Some people say, it affects some people more than others, no one really knows what causes mental issues, and a lot of other ideas...
The problem with mental issues is... it's not quantifiable. there's no real way to take a blood test and check indicators which will lead to more serious issues.

BUT... how about we look at mental illness, like any other illness.
Let's look at cancer or heart disease...
People who smoke have a higher chance of lung cancer.
People who have poor diets and lack of exercise have a higher chance for heart disease and diabetes.

These illnesses usually do not develop overnight. It's not like a patient wakes up suddenly and the next day he has heart disease, or (certain forms of) cancer.
Yes, some of these illnesses are hereditary. But more often than not, we can keep a relatively healthy lifestyle and diet and we can minimize the risk of getting illnesses.
Smoking, drinking, sun tanning, increases the risk of getting cancer, not confirm, but there's higher chance, also, just cos someone doesn't smoke, drink or sun tan, doesn't mean they can't get cancer, lower risk, but doesn't mean no risk.

So let's say that there are a bunch of situations where the patient has unpreventable heart disease, or unpreventable cancers, or whatever illness.
Then there's a bunch of patients who have preventable or can reduce the risk of whatever illness.

In the medical field, doctors can test for cholesterol, blood pressure, cancer markers, etc.
And if a patient has poor results, the doctor will recommend preventive measures.
Change of diet, exercise, stop smoking, stop alcohol consumption, stuff like that...

Why don't we look at mental illness/depression in the same way?
I don't think depression develops overnight. It's probably a long drawn out process of days, months, years. Maybe stress in whatever form it persists in. Stress from work, personal stress, expectations, societal expectations, stress can come from forms that we don't even know exist. It can even come from ourselves for no good reason.

If we look at depression like this, then the question becomes... is depression preventable?
Maybe in some cases, it's not preventable, like other illnesses...
BUT... maybe for other cases, depression IS preventable.

The question is, what did we do about it?
The problem here is, depression is invisible.
There's no extra fat, no blood test, no blood pressure test, urine test, etc to test for it.

So we don't know, the doctor doesn't know when the risks are high...
If we see a friend who's fat, and eats a lot of fatty stuff, it's obvious, we all know that his risk of heart disease is high.
If we see someone who smokes 2 packs of cigarettes a day, we also have an idea that his lung cancer risks are high.

Well... no such indicators for depression.
A lot of times depression, starts out as some form of stress, like school, or work.
And as adults, we are expected to suck it up.
Maybe we have high expectations of ourselves and we stress to produce high quality work and we ourselves give ourselves undue stress.
And day after day, this pressure builds up. Some people are better able to handle this stress, some people aren't.

Same as other illnesses, some people have good genes, they any-O-how eat also no problem.
But some people eat a bit and they easily gain weight and have changes in their blood tests.

And the thing is... in schools, or when we talk to the doctor... it's easy to get info about preventing of other illnesses, there's so much write up on good diet, exercise, don't smoke, don't expose yourself to UV rays, etc...
BUT... there's so little warning about mental issues.
So little information and preventive countermeasures that people learn to recognize mental issues and try too make things better.

Stress.... People are expected to just suck it up and get on with life... and THAT in itself is a stress upon the person.
The actual thing that stressed the person and furthermore, the stress that the person needs to act normal. So its like stress x2.

And even worse... we don't admit it to ourselves. We don't recognize it. Cos... WE OURSELVES think it's a form of weakness. We ourselves have an expectation of ourselves to just suck it up, cos we think it's normal.

So the thing about it is... is depression preventable?
Well, I think it is.
It's like any other illness.
It develops over time, it's not overnight.
We need to learn to recognize it and be willing to take active steps to improve the situation.
Change WILL be needed.
And change will always be hard.

To stop smoking isn't easy.
To control food intake or start exercising or to lose weight isn't easy...
It's the same thing.
Active steps to improve mental health WILL be needed to improve the situation.
If someone thinks that things will change without themselves doing anything, then that person is probably deluded.

You see, I don't believe in helplessness. There's always possible actions to take. The actions won't be easy, and it will take determination and discipline. But... it's necessary, else there will be consequences.
(Yes, I recognize, some illnesses aren't preventable, but we always try our best to prevent it IF we can, whenever we can.)
It's the same for mental illness, depression, addiction, etc...
We need to recognize it early and take steps to prevent it from becoming a full blown issue.
I'm talking about before the person falls into depression. It's like before a heart attack, or pre-diabetes.
The treatment and actions taken once the illness has taken effect is very different from before the actual illness.
Most of the time, we will try to prevent heart attack or diabetes way before the onset of the issue. It's a lot harder to tackle the issue once the problem becomes critical.
(Same as debt. It's better to handle the debt when it's a $5k debt than when it becomes a $50k debt.)

Why don't we talk about preventing the onset of depression?
Most of the time, people talk about trying to help someone with depression. That's already very tough, cos the patient, mentally isn't in good condition for treatment.
Pretty much the same as any other medical condition. Prevention is better than cure.

Now... it's easy to view what I say as being insensitive to mental issues.
I'm not trying to be.
I don't think anyone views, saying someone needs to change their diet and exercise to prevent heart disease as being insensitive.
Similarly, I believe that when someone in in poor mental condition, not necessarily already in depression, well, they have to recognize the issue and take active steps to get out of it.

See, the truth is...
I'm not particularly absolutely happy in Paris.
I've said it before. It's cold, it's boring, I've no friends and family around, it's like NS not for my country, but for my wife. I don't like to spend money, so I don't go around and just seek out wanton entertainment.
And I can see myself easily spiraling into depression if I'm not careful about it.
A week before I went back to SG, I was in pretty bad shape, sad, feeling down, cold, etc.
Maybe it's seasonal affective disorder. Just the changes in season.

And maybe readers would be saying... that's easy, he just needs to go and make friends, he just needs to go out more, he just needs to take up some courses, learn french, etc...
And what are these readers doing? Well, basically telling me ways to prevent it, on how to feel better. Is it insensitive? Maybe, maybe not...
You see, people do want to try to help me feel better, but maybe I don't like the options they have suggested.
In the end, it's up to me to do something about it. If I sit around in the house and mope and feel sad and grumpy with the weather and being bored... that's my fault.
If someone continues with a poor diet and lack of exercise... who's fault is it when he gets a heart attack?

So if I look at the path to depression... Not depression itself. But the path to depression... or maybe ANY illness.
It's similar.
Recognize the signs that things are not going well, and take steps to get better.

Eventually, I found out that just taking some walks and getting out of the house are good to make my mood better. Even in the cold. But if I continue to just stay in the house, and be lazy, then it's my own fault. if my mental condition worsens.
Also, I discussed with my wife about the progression of our stay and how long we will be staying out of SG, etc... and we came to some form of understanding, etc... So all these things help to keep my mental condition well.

So... are mental illnesses preventable?
I think that many of them are. The problem is identifying it and recognizing it before it becomes something worse. Then next, we need to take active steps to improve the situation and not give ourselves excuses.
Examples of excuses... But I can't... But I'm not like that... But I don't like...
In the end, for many cases, it's up to the patient to keep themselves healthy, physically, or mentally.

Next time you talk or think about depression or mental illness, maybe we should talk about the journey to depression and look to other illnesses as examples on how we handle similar medical issues.

<<PREVIOUS POST // NEXT POST>>

Did you like this post? If so, could you "blanjah" me 1/4 cup of my morning coffee pls.
You may also consider subscribing to receive the articles in your email, link in the column on the right.

1 Comment

Too Good to Go (Part 2)

22/11/2019

0 Comments

Here's the explanation for Too Good to Go in a previous post.

There's an app that allows eateries and shops to sell their leftover food for discounted prices after normal meal hours.
We decided to try the app again today.
At €3.99 this is ABSOLUTELY worth it.
We got a good serving of rice with spinach and stewed beef.
A bottled drink with some pastries, the pastries are bite sized and we got over 10 of them.
A slice of dessert and half a wrap which is supposed to be the appetizer.

We'll probably try this app one more time on next Friday to just try other types of food.
But this is making me lazy to cook and get free food, which is a bad thing.
We still enjoy the free food, except that this cheap food option is a good alternative and gives a change in flavour to the stuff I cook.

<<PREVIOUS POST // NEXT POST>>

Did you like this post? If so, could you "blanjah" me 1/4 cup of my morning coffee pls.
You may also consider subscribing to receive the articles in your email, link in the column on the right.

0 Comments

Why I Think Everyone Should Take A Year Off

21/11/2019

7 Comments

I've quit my job without a job twice in my life.
Once for 2 years then I returned to work to save more money, and again now, and I've been unemployed for around 4 years.
I don't really define what I'm currently doing. So I just use the terms, unemployed, retired, semi retired, sabbatical, etc... I just use whatever words that help to describe the situation depending on who I talk to and what I expect their reactions to be. Cos I really can't be bothered to explain too much.

Anyway... The thing is, I believe everyone should take a year off in their lives with no work and maybe do almost nothing. Not travel, not learn some new skill, basically, almost doing nothing...

The thing about it is... Perspective.

You see, as humans, we always tend to think about what's next, tend to think about keeping ourselves busy. There's always something to do.
And doing nothing... gives a perspective.
That there really is nothing to do.

Everything is an illusion that we build around ourselves.

The sun will rise again tomorrow. The world will keep turning.
And most of the time, we will be alive again tomorrow. What humans need is basically food to survive.
Shelter, clothes, insurance, etc... are pretty much secondary.
A lot of times, we build our lives and expectations and feel the expectations of others and society and all that... and we think that everything is such a big deal if we "lose it all"...
But in reality...
We just need air, water and food.
Then we start building our world around it...
Shelter, medical, clothes, family, society, stuff, more stuff, etc... all these are secondary. Some stuff are more important as secondary aspects, like shelter, clothes, medical, and other stuff not so important.

The thing is, when I left my job the first time, with quite a lot of savings, enough to get by for years but not really enough to retire... well, I quickly learnt that... there's so much illusions around us. The idea of jobs, societal expectations, parents expectations, the amount of money we really need to live, etc...

You see, we built this world, this illusion around us.
It is nothing, yet it is our everything.
If we let go of everything, it's just air, food and water.

When I think or read about people who commit suicide...
I wonder... why?
Depression? Why?
I ask myself... why? why? why?
Cos everything is our own doing.

Robin Williams, Kate Spade, Anthony Bourdain... Why?
They killed themselves over an illusion.
They were free to do whatever they wanted.
YOU are free to do pretty much whatever you want.
They could have just dropped everything. Disappeared to the middle of China and lived a quiet life without any communication with the outside world. Life would just go on.

Or when kids kill themselves over poor school results... I also ask why...
Cos... life goes on. The parents may scold them, but... life goes on, even if they don't study and just play all day, what is the parent going to do? Most likely just nag and scold, but life goes on.
But somehow, we, as humans, build illusions about expectations, we feel good when we fulfill other people's expectations, the kids WANT to live up to the expectations of their parents, etc...
And yet, this is... just an illusion, expectations is not tangible. It's just a mental thing. Just in the mind of the kid...

It's like the show "Cast Away"...
Tom Hanks was stranded on an island. That's IT... There's nothing there. Life goes on.
The world will keep turning, other people will continue to live their lives and move on. Life goes on for them also.
And as a stranded individual, he also learnt to live and survive.
Who cares about all the parcels which weren't delivered in the show? Cos he opened them all to find items he could potentially use to help himself survive.
By right, he isn't supposed to open the packages cos they aren't his... but... that's an illusion in the "real" world right? Cos now, in his "new" world, such rules don't exist. He needs to open the packages to increase his chances of survival.

And all these, I experienced when I left my job...
There is nothing in life. And I don't mean that in a bad way.
I mean it in a good way, that... life is what you build of it.
More often than not, a lot of things, are no big deal. Life goes on.
If you aren't happy with something in life, then... it's up to you to do something about it.
A lot of times, people think that money will solve the problem, so they just keep working, but actually the solution isn't money.
Now... of course, everything has a cost to it. Doesn't mean everything is free. You can do whatever you want with your life, but there's a cost to it.

For example if a kid is too stressed at school, can just choose to not study, take 1 month break, the parents WILL scold or nag the kid, results MAY suffer... BUT... life goes on. It's better for the kid to be mentally healthy and happy than to contemplate suicide.

Same for adults in real life situations. Maybe you feel trapped by your work, your debts, societal expectations.
You can always leave... walk away... but you'll lose your old life. You'll lose friends.
BUT remember... THIS old life IS the life that you aren't happy with. This is the life that you feel trapped in.
Walking away and starting again may be the best solution.

Or IF I'm unhappy in Paris, I could just pick up my passport and fly back to SG without my wife.
There will be consequences, but the thing is... there are always choices.

So the thing is... life is really what YOU YOURSELF make out of it.
There's really nothing there.
Since most of the things in our lives is an illusion, might as well make it an illusion that we enjoy.
Build the things which we like. When you're inside your current illusion, it's hard to see out of it. It's like the Matrix. And even if you understand it, I believe you won't fully appreciate it.

And for me, I really believe that people should just drop and go away for 6 months or a year...
And then, with the right mindset, they will understand that nothingness is really liberating.

<<PREVIOUS POST // NEXT POST>>

Did you like this post? If so, could you "blanjah" me 1/4 cup of my morning coffee pls.
You may also consider subscribing to receive the articles in your email, link in the column on the right.

7 Comments

Too Good to Go

20/11/2019

0 Comments

Ok... So I'm sure most readers know that my dinner is typically free cos I get free food in Paris.
However, recently, my wife chanced upon this app called "Too Good to Go".
In this app, eateries, supermarkets, bakeries, restaurants, etc, will upload their unsold food to sell for cheap prices.

So we decided to try this out for once.
Below is a set which we bought at €3.99.
This is after lunch. So the cafeteria packs their unsold lunch portions into containers and sells "mystery" packs. All shops sell their unsold food as "mystery" packs, so there's no choosing at all the shops.
There are sushi restaurants, supermarkets selling their precooked food, etc...

So we pay €3.99 and we don't know what we will get. We collect it around 3+pm after their lunch hours and I brought it home for dinner.

The celery salad is around 3 tablespoons worth of food, nothing great, and I don't like celery.
The dessert is a typical size dessert which you would find anywhere. Probably bigger than the circular tarts found at Chateraise.
The main course is a side dish of sauteed vegetables along with a fish mashed in potatoes. It's like mash potatoes with fish bits. It's quite a lot of fish so it's not like its just a mash potato side dish.

At €3.99, there's little to complain about. A ready to eat meal for dinner, just pop it into the over/microwave. The quantity is quite a lot.

Overall it's a good buy.

Typically, shops will sell their unsold food at much cheaper prices. Even though buyers don't know what they are going to get, usually the shop will make it worth it for the consumer. Cos it's an initiative to reduce food waste. Also the shops want repeat customers so there's no reason for the shop to short change the customers using this app.
So if you aren't fussy, it's a good deal to use the app over here in Paris.

If I'm not getting free food, this is a total steal. The food is reasonable in taste, a lot in quantity, cheap in price. There's really no where else to get such a good deal. Considering eating anything besides a sandwich will set me back over €15.
Remember, over here, a sandwich costs around €4-€6 depending on the ingredients of the sandwich.
Eating at any sit down place will cost me more than €15. So any warm food will cost me quite a lot.

This is like... well... it's not a sit down place and the food isn't warm, but I can take it home and heat it up and it's really cheap, and this price is pretty much unavailable anywhere else in Paris.
So if I wasn't getting free food, I would likely be using this app everyday to get my meals.

Apparently shoppers can also get "mystery" bags worth of groceries and all that kinda stuff. So it really helps to supplement the food for any one staying in Paris...
Unless the person gets their food for free... then of course it's not entirely worth it.

I'll likely use this app once or twice more to see what other meals I can get just for the fun of it.
It's fun to experiment with other resources and opportunities.
Free is good. But I also like to try other things cos even though I get free food, cos there are things I don't get, and I hardly eat out when I'm in Paris, so this gives me the opportunity to eat outside food cheaply before I leave Paris.

Unfortunately, I doubt this will take off in Singapore.
Cos in Singapore, food is too cheap. There's little incentive for people to buy leftovers at discounted prices. Unless the discount is really really worth it.
Over here, if I use the app, I'm getting around 70% discount. Cos I don't have cheap food alternatives.
But in SG, food can easily be found at $3. So unless it's some expensive restaurant selling the food at 70% discount, I doubt it's worth it for Singaporeans to take up such an offer.

<<PREVIOUS POST // NEXT POST>>

Did you like this post? If so, could you "blanjah" me 1/4 cup of my morning coffee pls.
You may also consider subscribing to receive the articles in your email, link in the column on the right.

0 Comments

Last But Not Least...

19/11/2019

0 Comments

Just a rant today...
You all know about this phrase... "Last but not least".
We hear it all the time right?

BUT!!! So many people don't know how to use it correctly.

Last but not least... There's a meaning to that.
Ever thought about the meaning behind this common phrase?
Or just use it any-O-how? Just pop it at the end of a list of things just to sound cool?

Think about it a little...
Last but not least...

Do you get it?
Ok here's an example...
I would like to thank... Tom, Dick and last but not least... Harry...
Means I would like to thank everyone... and at the end of the list, I would like to thank Harry, but just because he's at the end of the list, doesn't mean I thank him the least...

That's how you use the phrase...

There are 3 important things to retirement
Savings, investment, last but not least, expense control.
Means all are important, just because expense control is at the end of the sentence, doesn't mean it's the least important.

Whereas, a lot of times, people use this phrase and pop it at the end of any list of items.
To make a cake, you add flour, eggs, milk, last but not least, sugar...
No... that's not the way to use it.

Or, Hi ERSG, when you go to the supermarket can you please help me buy rice, sugar, last but not least, some chicken...
No... that's not the way to use it.

Last but not least is used when there appears to be a ranking of importance and you want to negate the assumption of un-importance of something at the end of the list.
It is not used for any listing where there's no meaning in the list.
It depends on how the sentence starts...

"Son, there are 3 important things I need you to buy from the shop. Batteries, sugar, last but not least, a spoon."
The phrase last but not least here indicates that there are 3 important things to buy, and the last item even though it's at the end doesn't mean it's any less important.

Alternatively, if the sentence is...
"Son, I need you to buy from the shop. Batteries, sugar, last but not least, a spoon."
This is the wrong way to use the phrase.
Cos in this case the phrase "last but not least" doesn't mean anything.

Did you know that?

<<PREVIOUS POST // NEXT POST>>

Did you like this post? If so, could you "blanjah" me 1/4 cup of my morning coffee pls.
You may also consider subscribing to receive the articles in your email, link in the column on the right.

0 Comments

What about Kids?

18/11/2019

0 Comments

How do you feel about not having kids? While having kids is not a guarantee of having someone at your deathbed, it increases the chances if you raise the kid right. In an event of being alone in an unfortunate situation , a kid can at least take care of you or execute your wishes on behalf of you. Examples of unfortunate situations are like a stroke, dementia etc. Or do you think it's all fated?
--Guest
https://earlyretirementsg.weebly.com/blog/what-am-i-living-for

So a Guest commented on one of my posts recently and I think it is an interesting question. I might have written about it previously but I think it would be good for me to add new thoughts and comments.

Personally, I think I do pretty well with kids.
And when I was younger, I wanted to have kids. But somehow, as life went on, I decided that I just didn't want them.

As I was younger, I lived life quite traditionally. I didn't think about life much. So I lived my life like anyone else. Study hard, etc etc. I expected to go to work, then get married, have kids and everything normal...

So I thought that having kids would be a normal part of my life. The usual traditional thoughts, passing on the family name, kids taking care of me when I'm older, etc etc.

As I grew older, I thought about life more, my thoughts changed and I decided that I didn't want kids.

Ok, so... what comes next is what I personally feel about kids.

As I went along with life, I started believing that I am an individual, and that people should be able to make individual choices. So, I actually hope that I don't need to take care of my parents, but due to upbringing and societal expectations, I still give my parents money, etc.
So IF I choose to have a kid, I wouldn't want my kid to have this expectation placed upon him/her. I would like the kid to live his own life and IF they want to come and visit, then come and visit me, if not, then please go ahead and live your own life.

IF I had a kid, it would be MY OWN lifestyle choice. Meaning, I made the choice to have a kid for my own "pleasure" cos maybe I feel like having the experience of having a kid and bringing the kid up.
Like skydiving. Some people feel they would like to try skydiving, others don't.
For me, I look at having kids like this. It is a lifestyle choice. A decision made by me, the parent, so that I myself will have a more complete life in my own opinion.

Since I look at having kids as my own lifestyle choice, for my own complete life experience, then I should not place any future expectations on the kid. After the kid has grown up, then I should not have any expectations that the kid will need to take care of me. Cos I have already "attained" what I wanted from the kid, which is the experience to have a kid.
Personally, I feel it is unfair to have any further expectations placed upon the child. Especially since I believe that people should be individuals who should be given the choice to decide on how they live their lives, without expectations from other people or society.

Now, of course this is my own view on having a kid. Everyone will have their own reasons for having a child so it's your own choice.

IF I ever choose to have a kid, it will be only for my own selfish desire to have another new life experience. It will be like another product or service. Like skydiving or bungee jumping. I will choose to do it just cos I want to do it cos I want to enhance MY OWN overall experience in my own life.

The child would have already "served his purpose" to give me this complete experience of having a child. But yet in my old age, I still give him another expectation, another duty, to take care of me? No, I don't think that's fair for the kid. The kid never had a choice whether they wanted to come to be born or not. It's always been due to the decision of the parent, and it would be selfish of me to continue to expect more from the child after the child grows up.

Currently, I don't feel like having this new life experience. Maybe someday I will, maybe I won't ever.

Do I like kids? Yes I do. But I don't feel the need or want to have them as a long term life experience.
Furthermore, I find that the "good days" of having kids are quite little, compared to the "tough days" of raising a kid.

As for my planning for old age and estate planning, it's still unknown. There's a good chance we'll have to check ourselves into an elderly home so that the last of us won't die rotting in the bed in our own home. There's some probability we'll set up a trust to manage our estate to support some cause we like in the future.

<<PREVIOUS POST // NEXT POST>>

Did you like this post? If so, could you "blanjah" me 1/4 cup of my morning coffee pls.
You may also consider subscribing to receive the articles in your email, link in the column on the right.

0 Comments

<<Previous

Author

Archives