I was overseas before CNY, and then after CNY I didn't post anything...
So I was thinking... what's up for this year??? Now that CNY is over.
And I thought... well, same as how it's always been.
My relationship with my wife is very good. We are both generally happy, we get frustrated with each other at times, but nothing really serious.
My wife goes to work on weekdays. I get free food and cook, and get other miscellaneous stuff if/when necessary, do the household administration, chores, make sure the bills are monitored and payed, etc etc.
Weekends we visit our parents, and Sunday is a rest day to do whatever we want, which is usually going out to eat breakfast and lunch then coming back home to rest for the rest of the day.
Every once in a while we go overseas for holidays or on her business trips...
And that's likely going to the how this year is going to pan out.
So I wonder... why or how do other people make their lives so complicated?
More often than not, most people follow a routine...
As long as they set up a fairly reasonable routine... everything should work out fine... No?
Most people work, they get their salary, then pay off their housing loan, then pay off insurance, then save/invest a certain amount, then pay off essential bills, then give their parents some money, then all the rest can go to misc spending.
And that's all there is to it... isn't this what life is in general?
Then spend more time working on building good relationships with wife, family, kids, friends, etc.
A typical Singaporean family, can easily follow a fairly reasonable financial routine and be stable financially. Then after that spend time and energy on being happy, or doing happy things.
Then I look around me... and I wonder... why are there so many people with issues?
So many people say. Not enough money, but... there IS enough money for most things.
I see people get bored and have affairs... It's the thrill of the hunt, or the thrill of not getting caught...
Or I see people get bored and do reno or buy a new car... well, that's fine if there's enough money, but don't complain not enough money after that.
Or spouses which quarrel over money, and yet they continue being unable to discern wants vs needs.
I see people who aren't getting more financially aware, either they have no interest, or they can't be bothered, or they are too afraid to talk about it. Don't laugh, try talking to your parents about money, most of the older generation don't like to discuss about financial planning.
Then the next thing we hear off is usually someone is uninsured and medical costs messes up the family situation.
Then there's poor communication between people... which is why I find it so important for people to spend time talking with each other and spending time and effort on relationships. Most people work... so the money portion typically settles itself if people are about to prioritize spending.
It's really the idea of... do the things that are important. Don't do the things that are easy.
Earning money is considered "easy". Just work lor. Just spend more time staying at work.
It's easy cos it's an actionable thing. It's also easy to quantify success using money. It's a number so my number bigger than yours, then I win lor...
But after a few basic needs, shelter, food, clothing, etc...
Money becomes not as important.
Then what's important becomes how you live your life, how the relationships are around you.
How to keep your life fulfilled. How to take care and show care and concern to the people around you.
How to live a rich life, and I'm not talking about it in monetary terms.
This is a lot harder to achieve. Cos... there's no easy fixed way to do it.
Different people react differently, talk differently, want different things, etc.
Need money? Just find a job, $3,000-$4,000 per month. That's about it. With prudent money management, that amount should be good enough for living a good enough life.
But... yet, many people lament, money no enough, and they spend more time and effort and energy trying to settle that problem.
But... is happiness bought with money?
I think a lot of us are aware of the hedonic treadmill.
We spend to make ourselves happy, then we get used to a certain level of spending and that's not exciting anymore, so that becomes the new normal.
So to make ourselves happy again, we spend even more, and the cycle continues.
Then again, there are people who will say, if you think money can't buy happiness, that means you don't have enough money... that's rubbish.
If I need to somehow find a way to earn $10,000,000 to be happy, then I would rather find a way to be happy with $3,000 per month. At least this is more achievable and anyone could do it.
I suppose following the same thinking... it's easier to get a mistress for short term fun, than to build a better relationship with a spouse. I mean... it's really hard to have open communications about one's insecurities, fears, wants, hopes, expectations, etc... it's hard cos there's pride involved... it's normal for the male to be "manly" and he doesn't want to say what he wants, or that he might be insecure over the finances but doesn't want to express it out.
And this might also be the same for the female, where she might think that her concerns are petty, but they are important to her, and yet she can't say them out cos the husband may judge her for being petty...
Communication is a whole complex issue. A lot harder than earning money, where people just go to the workplace, the boss says something, then just do, and at the end of the day go home, end of the month, get some money... that's easy.
Anyway... so that's about it for today's post... I just find it really strange... Life is really quite simple. But it's people that make life much more complicated than it's supposed to be.
What do we need in life? Food, lodging, insurance, clothes, medical... a bit of this and that??? Those are actually quite easily settled.
And yet... why are so many people unhappy? Or uncontented?
I think?... cos people aren't fixing the right issues.
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