Well, I'm not sure if I'm really back into writing but I've been having some thoughts recently so I just thought I'd just pen them all down.
I've been thinking about a lot of things. Mostly about my past and the people I've met and how many people I've not kept in contact with and about those I've kept in regular contact with.
I heard this from an ex colleague once. Not sure if I had already written about it.
She knew about me leaving my job. And when we were meeting for some gathering and eating she commented.
"Wow! You're so lucky! I wish I could also quit and do nothing."
Of which I obviously replied.
"Sure you can. Just quit."
The resulting conversation went something like the below.
"No la. How can, what am I going to eat, still need to spend, etc."
"Of course you can. I mean look at me. You know, you can just take a bus or walk."
"Oh no, I can't do that."
"Or you can eat simply, like cheaper food on regular days."
"Oh no, I can't do that."
"I just go for trips around South East Asia region, I don't go to Europe and all that, you could spend less on travel as well"
"Oh no, I can't do that."
"Or maybe cut down on bags?"
"Oh no, I can't do that."
"Oh the food here not bad hor?"
Nothing left to talk about nothing left to say.
It's not that she couldn't leave her job or cut down or whatever, she didn't want to.
She didn't want to trade off what she had for stuff she didn't have.
ie, she didn't want to trade her luxuries for more time and etc etc.
So.... Yea....
Ok but seriously, that's fine. Maybe all these bags and big cars makes her feel good. And that's all ok.
But I just get totally cheesed off when people say "Oh wow so lucky you can leave your job, etc".
It's not about luck. It's always been about what I was willing to give up.
And if you aren't willing to give them up, it's all fine and dandy. If that makes you happy so be it.
But don't compare me to you.
And mind you. I don't live a poor life. Like most other financial freedom fighters, we don't particularly live on the edge of poverty. We actually live well. Just that we spend money on the stuff that makes us happy. We understand the stuff which we personally value and spend when we need to. Whereas for the stuff which we don't value too much, we cut down on those. Cos you can't be buying the best of everything. Well, you can... but...
So what do we value?
Food. We spend a good deal on food. Not just any food. Even though we love good food, we still look for good deals as we eat well.
I buy ribeye steaks, tenderloin to cook for myself. If I go to a steak place, I usually have 1 for 1 promotion.
We eat dim sum pretty regularly. Usual spend is SGD50 for 2 pax.
I get my sashimi/sushi from Meidi-ya at Liang Court. They are better than those found at your regular supermarkets and you can get more premium stuff per dollar. Than if you get them from restaurants, so basically I used to spend around SGD50 at a Jappy place for basic sushi, but now I spend SGD50 at Meidi-ya but I get better stuff like sea urchin and ootoro. The only issue is that you don't get to sit down.
Good buffets. Again, I usually have 1 for 1 and it adds up to around SGD100 for 2 pax. And I look for stuff which we usually wouldn't be able to get elsewhere. Lobsters and foie gras.
But it doesn't mean we eat such stuff everyday. We still want to live good long lives. So like everything else, have try to keep a good balance. Normal home cooked food on weekdays and some better indulgences on weekends.
What do we not spend on?
Stuff.
I really have no other way to describe it. Stuff...
You know, a bit here a bit there, somehow the money just disappears.
There's an unlimited number of things to buy. Cute stuff here, cool stuff there. Just a browse through Taobao or Qoo10 and there's always something unnecessary to buy for a couple of bucks.
We don't buy much stuff. I believe it just creates clutter around the house. And a clean neat house is stress free and easy to tidy.
It's not that my wife doesn't have bags. She has bags. Cheap ones, expensive ones, leather ones, ones for dinner parties, one for weekends, one for work, etc. But she doesn't buy them regularly. Some are gifts. Some were really really good deals. But generally, she doesn't... or rather, isn't allowed to buy stuff unless she throws something away. No seriously. There's 15-20 bags in the cupboard somewhere. I think it's reasonable to set a rule that unless something is thrown, a replacement is not needed. Same for shoes and dresses.
That's not to say she can't buy nice stuff. Just use them well before throwing it away and getting a new one. Else there's no end to it. There's always some other stuff to buy. That's the whole point. Taobao is limitless, LV, Prada, Burberry is limitless. If there isn't any rules in place, the cupboard could be easily filled with "just one more".
You don't buy a new rice cooker cos every time a new model is out right?
Many girls say, you should buy a good bag which lasts for 10 years. A good LV leather can last for 10 years. A cheapo one would fall apart after 3 months. AND I TOTALLY AGREE!!! No seriously. I do.
Just make sure you use that bag for 10 years and not buy another one during that period. Then it's totally reasonable. Else don't use that argument.
Doesn't mean you shouldn't buy it. It's your money, do whatever makes you happy. Rather, make it a conscious decision. Don't give lame excuses.
"I like this bag. It is expensive. I know I shouldn't. But I don't have one and I've always wanted one. I'll treat this bag well and will cut down spending on.... "
(suddenly have inspiration on my next post.... 曾经拥有 I once used to have)
Cos if you allow yourself to fool yourself with lame excuses, you'll fool yourself again the next time, and the next and the next. But if you make a rational decision on the purchase then there's a lower chance you will find an excuse to buy another one.
Other forms of stuff.
Toys. Don't get me wrong. I love toys. Like Otaku style toys. You know, figurines, Gundam, etc. You know those display toys you see at Akihabara. I love those. I've never owned them, but I love them. I always wanted a whole display cabinet full of them.
Then I thought of the consequence of owning them. It's not even about the money. Maintaining a cupboard of toys takes time and effort. I'd need to dust them, clean them and all that to keep them in good display condition. Else why bother to get them if they don't look good.
Yes. It's probably expensive as well and once again, limitless. There's a whole plethora of anime/manga which are made into figurines and they all look so nice. But yea... I've never owned them and never will. I'm content with looking at them through the display of shops and that's fine with me. I prefer not owning them and not having to maintain them. Than owning them and having to clean them. Not to mention that, as a human, after getting any piece, I'd get bored of looking at it and just ignore it after a while. So the novelty is really that I know I'll never own them and I'll continue to admire them through a display at a shop.
Cos the desire is only cool when I know I can't get it. Once I own it, there's no more desire and it's no longer cool anymore and I'd just desire something else. Why else do you think people keep buying stuff?
Which leads me to my next post.... 曾经拥有 I once used to have
<<PREVIOUS POST // NEXT POST>>
I've been thinking about a lot of things. Mostly about my past and the people I've met and how many people I've not kept in contact with and about those I've kept in regular contact with.
I heard this from an ex colleague once. Not sure if I had already written about it.
She knew about me leaving my job. And when we were meeting for some gathering and eating she commented.
"Wow! You're so lucky! I wish I could also quit and do nothing."
Of which I obviously replied.
"Sure you can. Just quit."
The resulting conversation went something like the below.
"No la. How can, what am I going to eat, still need to spend, etc."
"Of course you can. I mean look at me. You know, you can just take a bus or walk."
"Oh no, I can't do that."
"Or you can eat simply, like cheaper food on regular days."
"Oh no, I can't do that."
"I just go for trips around South East Asia region, I don't go to Europe and all that, you could spend less on travel as well"
"Oh no, I can't do that."
"Or maybe cut down on bags?"
"Oh no, I can't do that."
"Oh the food here not bad hor?"
Nothing left to talk about nothing left to say.
It's not that she couldn't leave her job or cut down or whatever, she didn't want to.
She didn't want to trade off what she had for stuff she didn't have.
ie, she didn't want to trade her luxuries for more time and etc etc.
So.... Yea....
Ok but seriously, that's fine. Maybe all these bags and big cars makes her feel good. And that's all ok.
But I just get totally cheesed off when people say "Oh wow so lucky you can leave your job, etc".
It's not about luck. It's always been about what I was willing to give up.
And if you aren't willing to give them up, it's all fine and dandy. If that makes you happy so be it.
But don't compare me to you.
And mind you. I don't live a poor life. Like most other financial freedom fighters, we don't particularly live on the edge of poverty. We actually live well. Just that we spend money on the stuff that makes us happy. We understand the stuff which we personally value and spend when we need to. Whereas for the stuff which we don't value too much, we cut down on those. Cos you can't be buying the best of everything. Well, you can... but...
So what do we value?
Food. We spend a good deal on food. Not just any food. Even though we love good food, we still look for good deals as we eat well.
I buy ribeye steaks, tenderloin to cook for myself. If I go to a steak place, I usually have 1 for 1 promotion.
We eat dim sum pretty regularly. Usual spend is SGD50 for 2 pax.
I get my sashimi/sushi from Meidi-ya at Liang Court. They are better than those found at your regular supermarkets and you can get more premium stuff per dollar. Than if you get them from restaurants, so basically I used to spend around SGD50 at a Jappy place for basic sushi, but now I spend SGD50 at Meidi-ya but I get better stuff like sea urchin and ootoro. The only issue is that you don't get to sit down.
Good buffets. Again, I usually have 1 for 1 and it adds up to around SGD100 for 2 pax. And I look for stuff which we usually wouldn't be able to get elsewhere. Lobsters and foie gras.
But it doesn't mean we eat such stuff everyday. We still want to live good long lives. So like everything else, have try to keep a good balance. Normal home cooked food on weekdays and some better indulgences on weekends.
What do we not spend on?
Stuff.
I really have no other way to describe it. Stuff...
You know, a bit here a bit there, somehow the money just disappears.
There's an unlimited number of things to buy. Cute stuff here, cool stuff there. Just a browse through Taobao or Qoo10 and there's always something unnecessary to buy for a couple of bucks.
We don't buy much stuff. I believe it just creates clutter around the house. And a clean neat house is stress free and easy to tidy.
It's not that my wife doesn't have bags. She has bags. Cheap ones, expensive ones, leather ones, ones for dinner parties, one for weekends, one for work, etc. But she doesn't buy them regularly. Some are gifts. Some were really really good deals. But generally, she doesn't... or rather, isn't allowed to buy stuff unless she throws something away. No seriously. There's 15-20 bags in the cupboard somewhere. I think it's reasonable to set a rule that unless something is thrown, a replacement is not needed. Same for shoes and dresses.
That's not to say she can't buy nice stuff. Just use them well before throwing it away and getting a new one. Else there's no end to it. There's always some other stuff to buy. That's the whole point. Taobao is limitless, LV, Prada, Burberry is limitless. If there isn't any rules in place, the cupboard could be easily filled with "just one more".
You don't buy a new rice cooker cos every time a new model is out right?
Many girls say, you should buy a good bag which lasts for 10 years. A good LV leather can last for 10 years. A cheapo one would fall apart after 3 months. AND I TOTALLY AGREE!!! No seriously. I do.
Just make sure you use that bag for 10 years and not buy another one during that period. Then it's totally reasonable. Else don't use that argument.
Doesn't mean you shouldn't buy it. It's your money, do whatever makes you happy. Rather, make it a conscious decision. Don't give lame excuses.
"I like this bag. It is expensive. I know I shouldn't. But I don't have one and I've always wanted one. I'll treat this bag well and will cut down spending on.... "
(suddenly have inspiration on my next post.... 曾经拥有 I once used to have)
Cos if you allow yourself to fool yourself with lame excuses, you'll fool yourself again the next time, and the next and the next. But if you make a rational decision on the purchase then there's a lower chance you will find an excuse to buy another one.
Other forms of stuff.
Toys. Don't get me wrong. I love toys. Like Otaku style toys. You know, figurines, Gundam, etc. You know those display toys you see at Akihabara. I love those. I've never owned them, but I love them. I always wanted a whole display cabinet full of them.
Then I thought of the consequence of owning them. It's not even about the money. Maintaining a cupboard of toys takes time and effort. I'd need to dust them, clean them and all that to keep them in good display condition. Else why bother to get them if they don't look good.
Yes. It's probably expensive as well and once again, limitless. There's a whole plethora of anime/manga which are made into figurines and they all look so nice. But yea... I've never owned them and never will. I'm content with looking at them through the display of shops and that's fine with me. I prefer not owning them and not having to maintain them. Than owning them and having to clean them. Not to mention that, as a human, after getting any piece, I'd get bored of looking at it and just ignore it after a while. So the novelty is really that I know I'll never own them and I'll continue to admire them through a display at a shop.
Cos the desire is only cool when I know I can't get it. Once I own it, there's no more desire and it's no longer cool anymore and I'd just desire something else. Why else do you think people keep buying stuff?
Which leads me to my next post.... 曾经拥有 I once used to have
<<PREVIOUS POST // NEXT POST>>
RSS Feed
