What did you expect your retirement to be when you haven retire? Feel free to not reply. I am just curious. I notice that there are people who retire early mentally slow down much faster than people who work. obviously this is not the case for you. Do you purposely keep your mind active?
-Guest
It's a long reply so I thought I'd do a post on it and I think it's a good question.
The idea of retirement isn't overnight.
Things happen, things change, then people think of retiring.
I'm no exception.
When we are young, no one thinks of retirement.
When we first go to work, I'm sure we hope to be rich and successful in our careers.
Or start successful businesses.
So long long time ago, when I was really young, in my teens, I would think that I would start a business, then as I grew older, I would continue working as an old businessman. Cos there would be staff working, and I'd do minimal things in the office.
Then when I grew older, in Uni, when I was studying finance, I would envision myself working as an investment professional til older. I didn't think of retiring early. I would want to be rich and successful.
I would think I'd retire older at 55? 60? Maybe... and go suntan at the country club or something, sipping some cocktail with my friends or playing golf.
I wrote about "The truth is, no one really wants to retire early"
The thing is, when we are young, no one really thinks of retirement. They think of career success and aim for that. Except that more often than not, it's elusive.
So when I went to work...
And life and work didn't turn out as fun as I envisioned it.
So I quit the first time. Took a "break" when I was 27 years old. After 3 years of work.
I knew it couldn't be permanent cos I didn't have enough money yet.
For the next 2 years, I did a number of things.
For the first year, I did what I would do on any extended holiday.
Played a lot of video/computer games, exercised, slept a lot.
It was fun.
Wake up late, go out for a run, play games, time passed so fast, it's dinner time and it's almost time to repeat. It's like being a kid all over again.
But I knew this wasn't sustainable at this point in my life.
On the 2nd year, I tried to do real estate sales, and financial advisory. I realized that I'm not good at selling stuff. Then I tried to help out my wife's uncle at his business, but that didn't turn out well, cos he wasn't managing his business properly, consuming his profits instead of reinvesting into the business for the business to continue.
These 2 years I realized that... hey... doing "nothing" and enjoying life is fun. Playing games is fun, living a simple life is fun. I don't need to be rich to enjoy life. There are other things to do which are fun that doesn't require money. It's not as though the only way to enjoy life is to sip cocktail by the pool.
Eventually, I went back to work in the same company.
For the next few years, I worked thinking about retiring early so that I can return to my life of fun.
After 3 years, I transferred to another department. Unfortunately, this other department wasn't a good place to work. So I decided to leave after half a year.
On hindsight, it might have been better to farm and not request for transfer cos my initial department was boring but a good place to farm at. But that's the past so... oh well...
So I left work again... and once again, I thought this was going to be only temporary. Cos I expected to need to farm another 3 years to be fully retired.
Once again, for the first few months, I was enjoying myself. Slept in, exercised, played game.
This was when I was still living with my parents.
In a couple of months I moved to my new place with my wife, and soon she changed jobs, so I needed to wake up early and send her to work, cos her work was in Tuas. Since it's my own place, I did all the admin of the new home, the coordination of the renovation, cleaning the place, marketing and cooking, these things take a lot more time than what most people think. Then I wrote my blog, went out with friends, played some computer games.
When I started getting free stuff, it's similar to going grocery shopping, meeting friends and entertainment all at once. And this was the activity that sealed my long term retirement. Cos I realized I needed less money than what I thought initially.
So... if we look at how my "retirement" progressed from young til now, the reality... is really very far from what I envisioned it.
Cos when I was younger, my expectations of life and how my career and life would unfold was very different from what really happened.
And due to that, I adjusted my plans to work around the situation, might not be the best solution, but probably the "best" solution that I thought possible.
I mean, everyone tries their best to do what they think is best for themselves. Whether it really is the best or not, is only obvious on hindsight.
When I was in my teens, I expected to retire older. In the conventional sense of retirement. Earn money, get rich and appear to live life in perceived luxury.
In my late 20s, I expected and was willing to play games and just relax on less.
Now, (if I didn't end up overseas), I would probably not play games anymore and just go out and get free stuff and hang with friends. It's a lot more entertaining than just playing games.
I realized that money wasn't the factor to have fun. It's not about playing golf or travelling. Money is only for certain stuff which can't be obtained for free. Many things can be obtained for free. Fun can be obtained in many ways.
It's possible to buy stuff and fun with money...
But it's also possible to obtain stuff and have fun without money. Just that we aren't wired in this way, cos society has indoctrinated into us, that you need money for everything.
Sitting around sipping cocktail by the pool or having high tea sipping tea gets boring really quickly when done regularly. I've done that before. Lying down in the sun, suntanning, going swimming everyday. It's boring when you're by yourself cos most of the time retirement, especially early retirement, is lonely.
I think it was really good for me to take a couple of years off. Cos it allowed me to understand what it means to have "nothing" to do. To have lots of free time, but yet not spend as though it's just weekend.
I wrote about that... Why I Think Everyone Should Take A Year Off
and about... The Art of Doing Nothing
The thing is, like any phase of life, we adjust...
We try to do something which we think is best for ourselves, then adjust from there.
Keep taking small steps to improve. If something doesn't work, to adjust again.
It's like looking for discounts. First we pay full price, then we learn that there are cheaper places to buy certain things, then even cheaper places, or use certain promo codes, or credit card promos, and for me, I eventually ended up being able to get a lot of things for free.
The whole idea of retiring rich and playing golf at the country club and travelling the world is but an illusion.
Cos... that can't be done everyday anyway.
There will be the real "retirement life" which many retirees end up taking care of grandkids or something along those lines.
Then on weekends, they go play golf, and maybe once a year they go travel.
So no matter what, there's going to be this new "retirement life" which is the daily routine. Could be morning tai chi, afternoon lunch with friends, then help out at the RC, or whatever.
There will be a new routine.
And AFTER THAT... then same like in working life, the weekends, then go and play golf and once a year then go on trips. Or something along those lines. Unless you have many other retiree friends to play golf with you everyday. It's possible, but unlikely.
The imagined retirement life when young, is typically very different from the real retirement life when it actually happens. Cos... that's life, we never know what we want, until we really experience it. We don't really know what kind of retirement we want. So we can only plan on what we THINK we want, then when it happens, we slowly adjust until we end up with a retirement that suits our tastes.
As for the question on slowing down mentally or keeping the mind active
That's going to be for tomorrow's post.
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