I'm only human.
I get angry, upset, scared, sad, depressed, etc.
All the emotions that come about just cos I'm human.
That's just part of being human. Duh right?
But seriously. Happiness is truly a decision. Yes it is so easy to be happy.
The only problem is, can you overcome yourself?
One of the most common ways to quickly get angry is driving.
Driving along the expressway is a hazardous experience.
Someone cuts into your lane, someone brakes suddenly, someone flashes headlights at you, someone honks at you.
The list goes on. So whenever something like the above happens to me, I feel this surge of emotions within me. The desire to honk back, or to cut back into his lane or to... whatever to get back at the other driver.
So let us break down the string of incidences.
1) Someone cuts into my lane for example.
2) I get angry/upset.
3) I chase the other car and try to overtake.
4) I cut back into his lane.
5) I feel happy with whatever I did.
Total time elapsed = 5-10 mins
Wasted money on acceleration for chasing the car, etc etc
Maybe it goes something like the above... MAYBE
Or maybe
6) He also gets upset, he races with me, we get into an accident, we get into a fight, etc etc.
Total time elapsed = 1-2 hours depending on whatever happens
If there is an accident this issue could go on for days.
Wasted money on acceleration for chasing the car, accident, etc etc
A whole load of other rubbish may happen. MAY, or MAYBE not... 1% is also a chance...
Alternatively, I could
1) Someone cuts into my lane.
2) I get angry/upset.
3) I will myself to suppress my anger, the car moves away, I never see him again.
Total time elapsed = 2 seconds
So yes it is SIMPLE in theory.
Do I do this, yes I do. Is it easy? Not really. It takes a strong will to let it go.
Of course I get upset. I'm only human.
But I always tell myself. Anger is not quantifiable. There is no value in anger.
Racing my car is quantifiable. I waste money by burning more petrol.
Time is also quantifiable. I waste time being angry when it could be over in mere seconds.
Another example.
My wife does something to upset me.
Whatever it is...
I get upset, I give her some silent treatment, we go to bed with some cold treatment (not angry but just silent).
The next day there is some silence as well. Both of us are kinda still upset... etc...
Time elapsed = 2-24 hours
Alternatively, I get upset, I give her some silent treatment, I tell her why I'm upset, we try to iron it out.
Time elapsed = 30 minutes
I'm not going to get divorced with my wife for these small matters.
So why bother to stay upset for hours or days? It's not worth it. Don't keep carrying the burden.
Husbands and wives do get into disagreements.
But 2 days later, 5 days later, more often than not, things work out and people make up.
So why wait 2 days? Why not let it go now?
So yes, happiness is as simple as that.
Are you strong enough to decide to be happy?
I'll leave you with a story below.
There are a few meanings to the story. So just take it in good faith and in the way I mean it.
I get angry, upset, scared, sad, depressed, etc.
All the emotions that come about just cos I'm human.
That's just part of being human. Duh right?
But seriously. Happiness is truly a decision. Yes it is so easy to be happy.
The only problem is, can you overcome yourself?
One of the most common ways to quickly get angry is driving.
Driving along the expressway is a hazardous experience.
Someone cuts into your lane, someone brakes suddenly, someone flashes headlights at you, someone honks at you.
The list goes on. So whenever something like the above happens to me, I feel this surge of emotions within me. The desire to honk back, or to cut back into his lane or to... whatever to get back at the other driver.
So let us break down the string of incidences.
1) Someone cuts into my lane for example.
2) I get angry/upset.
3) I chase the other car and try to overtake.
4) I cut back into his lane.
5) I feel happy with whatever I did.
Total time elapsed = 5-10 mins
Wasted money on acceleration for chasing the car, etc etc
Maybe it goes something like the above... MAYBE
Or maybe
6) He also gets upset, he races with me, we get into an accident, we get into a fight, etc etc.
Total time elapsed = 1-2 hours depending on whatever happens
If there is an accident this issue could go on for days.
Wasted money on acceleration for chasing the car, accident, etc etc
A whole load of other rubbish may happen. MAY, or MAYBE not... 1% is also a chance...
Alternatively, I could
1) Someone cuts into my lane.
2) I get angry/upset.
3) I will myself to suppress my anger, the car moves away, I never see him again.
Total time elapsed = 2 seconds
So yes it is SIMPLE in theory.
Do I do this, yes I do. Is it easy? Not really. It takes a strong will to let it go.
Of course I get upset. I'm only human.
But I always tell myself. Anger is not quantifiable. There is no value in anger.
Racing my car is quantifiable. I waste money by burning more petrol.
Time is also quantifiable. I waste time being angry when it could be over in mere seconds.
Another example.
My wife does something to upset me.
Whatever it is...
I get upset, I give her some silent treatment, we go to bed with some cold treatment (not angry but just silent).
The next day there is some silence as well. Both of us are kinda still upset... etc...
Time elapsed = 2-24 hours
Alternatively, I get upset, I give her some silent treatment, I tell her why I'm upset, we try to iron it out.
Time elapsed = 30 minutes
I'm not going to get divorced with my wife for these small matters.
So why bother to stay upset for hours or days? It's not worth it. Don't keep carrying the burden.
Husbands and wives do get into disagreements.
But 2 days later, 5 days later, more often than not, things work out and people make up.
So why wait 2 days? Why not let it go now?
So yes, happiness is as simple as that.
Are you strong enough to decide to be happy?
I'll leave you with a story below.
There are a few meanings to the story. So just take it in good faith and in the way I mean it.
"A senior monk and a junior monk were traveling together. At one point, they came to a river with a strong current. As the monks were preparing to cross the river, they saw a very young and beautiful woman also attempting to cross. The young woman asked if they could help her cross to the other side.
The two monks glanced at one another because they had taken vows not to touch a woman.
Then, without a word, the older monk picked up the woman, carried her across the river, placed her gently on the other side, and carried on his journey.
The younger monk couldn’t believe what had just happened. After rejoining his companion, he was speechless, and an hour passed without a word between them.
Two more hours passed, then three, finally the younger monk could contain himself any longer, and blurted out “As monks, we are not permitted a woman, how could you then carry that woman on your shoulders?”
The older monk looked at him and replied, “Brother, I set her down on the other side of the river, why are you still carrying her?”
RSS Feed
